Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Moon on Water Prompt #6
6) Regarding the nature of romantic love, some people say that each of us has only one soul mate-- a person who is destined for us by the stars, a person who is such a perfect match that they bind with us perfectly, completing us, making us whole. Others say that there are many people out there who are perfect for us-- that there are many great loves available to us. Which do you think is true?
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Prompt #6: I think the first one is true. In Chinese’ culture people believe when someone were born there is another half was waiting for you. (One would complement each other).
ReplyDeleteI think that there are many loves in a lifetime, but there can only be one greatest love. There are people who get into relationships, fall in love, and what not. However, people always change. Some people can adjust to their significant other's changes. But for the people who can't, their love ends, and they move on to find a better person. There's a cycle in life -- friendships become relationships, relationships become marriages, marriages become divorces, etc. -- of finding the best person for you, and that is achievable. However, I don't think there is such thing as the only perosn for you.
ReplyDeleteI heard some of my friends said when they break up with their girlfriend or boyfriends, “We get together because we want to know each other more, but we break up because we know each other too much.” I think it’s true. However, I think no one is prefect, if he or she is; he or she isn’t your boyfriend or girlfriend, right? It is because if he or she is prefect, then he or she must be other people girlfriend or boyfriend. Why? It is because you are jealous or you are not feeling comfortable with your girlfriend or boyfriend right now. When we are not satisfied, we will make comparison, even though, your girlfriend or boyfriend was prefect to you before. Sometimes, we think argument isn’t a good thing in a relationship. Maybe we think our relationship will be the end, but it’s not. When we have argument, we should solve. I think the prefect lover should be a person who can solve the problems with you together, but not arguing with you.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Xiao-Li, in life you may find many people that you can connect with and find yourself loving. However, there will be that someone out there that surpasses the rest. This person may have their flaws, but you find yourself loving every aspect of him/her; this is your soul mate, your only one.
ReplyDeleteInteresting comments on this one.
ReplyDeleteIf there is only one true soul mate out there, as some of you are indicating, then what are the chances of finding him or her among the other six billion people out there?
Does the love you have for a person ever really die entirely? Even if you broke up 20 years ago?
Do you think most people have a greatest love? Do you think many people find their greatest love, but for whatever reason cannot marry them? It's a classic story-- a person falling in love with someone who appears to be his or her soul mate, only to fail to remain with that person, through either that person's fault or some other circumstances.
Do you think many people give up trying to find a perfect love and instead settle for something good enough?
I agree with Xiao-li‘s point of view. God makes us come together and become friends, classmates, good-friends, and partners. Fate is like a bridge which connects us together and becomes life-partners; it is always surrounding us, and waiting for us to catch the right time to enjoy it. Some people may fall in love with one person in their lives, and he/she is the life-partner; while others may fall in love with a lot of people, and find their life-partner in the end. Finally, we can find your perfect math person. A lot of people say “the person who you marry with, he/she is not the best love in your life.” I agree with this, because of the some reason that can’t get marry.
ReplyDeleteI believe there is no such thing as soul mates, know body is a perfect compatibility with you anyway because you make that person you perfect soul mate by changing their style and idea thinking to your own making them a copy of yourself making seem a perfect match in heaven. this is a twisted sense that love is not great but a manipulation of a person true essence.
ReplyDeleteI believe the point that there are many great loves availabe to us. Love is not a matching game or a constellation test. Love is forbearance, understanding, care. Because nobody is perfect, when you start a relationship you will find out that your partiner is not that person in your mind. But it doesn't mean you need to break up with him/her. There won't be somebody think and do exactly the same thing as you. make some change for your lover, and both of you will find out that he/she is just the one you are trying to find.
ReplyDeleteI agree with the second theory on love. Throughout our life, we would bump into numerous love relationships that will tend to break off. Love before marriage is similar to that of a matching game, where both partners would try to find an emotional and mental compromise with the opposition. If that fails that they would break up and move onto another partner. There is no “perfect” match, and when one finally find someone whom is, maybe, close to perfect (fulfills some of their love requirements) they’ll probably end up getting married. But even then, who knows if the marriage will last for long? Maybe as time progress, the partners find each other nothing like the person they met in the beginning and divorce. Life along with everything around it is constantly changing, so nothing is really stable even with love. Hope I made sense haha :D
ReplyDeleteI don't believe love exists. People get married because they find someone they care for at that moment in their lives. But people change as they grow and sometimes both partners are able to change together and sometimes they just stop caring as much as they used to.
ReplyDeleteMy psychology instructor said each person has at least ten bad qualities. When we date we see only 2 of our partners bad qualities but after we get married we see all ten. If you really care for the other person you find ways to deal with those eight.
I watched a show before. The man said, “When a man want the woman loves him, his love engine will be started and it will last for 3 days.” Additionally, he called it, “Titanic love”. Why it is Titanic? It is because Jack and Rose’s love cannot last for 3 days. Therefore, he said, “Why Jack will let Rose lives and he dies? It is because his love’s engine is still running at that time.” When my friend, who is a girl, watched it, she said, “Yes. I think it is true because I think my boyfriend is prefect in the first few days, after we know each other more, he is no longer prefect anymore.” My female friends always said their boyfriend couldn’t be prefect for a long time. (Or I might say their boyfriend were not met the requirement at that time.) What is the meaning of he’s not prefect for me anymore? I don’t really get it. After few months, I would see my friend break up with her boyfriend, and she might say, “You know what? I love him so much before, and why will we have this ending and it’s not what I’m thinking.” Complaint and regret are in her mind, and this is the ending? No. She will find the other boyfriend and start a new relationship. Guess what? Her boyfriend was prefect for first few days. After that, same thing happened, so when will be the end of this cycle? Never? However, sometimes I find someone is really special. I have a female friend and she breaks up with her boyfriend almost eighty times. Is it the true love? I don’t know. If they can last forever, I might say yes, but they broke up last month already. They might fill with complaint and regret in their minds and hearts.
ReplyDeleteFirst I would like to clarify the meaning of “perfect for each other”. Perfect of each other doesn’t mean that the couples share all interests; it doesn’t mean that they have to like the same music or have similar life experiences. Many times on movies we see two people falling in love and it usually starts out by sharing the same interests like the girl starts saying a quote from a book and the guy finishes it and boom they are in love. But that’s not how it works it real life. A person that is perfect for you is our second half not the duplicate of our first half.
ReplyDeleteYour soul mate is not supposed to be someone you’ve always imagined but instead some one that completely caught you off guard and even after you’re together, “perfect for each other” or “soul mate” doesn’t mean there won’t be any disagreement. There will always be something to argue about but when you’re arguing, you still know deep inside that that person is yours and you’ll get mad at yourself for saying the things you’ve said. When you love that person you will know what to do, what to say and when to say it to make thing better.
For those of you that said there is no such thing as a true soul mate and even some that said love doesn’t exist at all, sorry to say but I couldn’t disagree more. Your soul mate is out there and you don’t have to go on six billion dates to find them. Finding our soul mate is not our job our job is just to know when they come.
Like Daniel Freeman said I think the problem with most people is that we give up and settle for what’s good enough and in some other cases we are mislead by physical features and material things. I for one would be very happy to date a girl with a BMW. But when it comes to our soul mate we have to dig a lot deeper than that. We have to be able to picture our soul mate being broke, eighty five, and still love them regardless.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIUv3dOBbCk
ReplyDeleteHere is a link to a music that supports what i said. listen to the lyrics (hope it's allowed)
cool idea posting the link, kal-- great idea.
ReplyDeleteThat's how much I need you And I can't stand ya
ReplyDeleteMost everything you do make me wanna smile
Can I not like it for a while?
No, but you won't let me
You upset me, girl, and then you kiss my lips
All of a sudden I forget that I was upset
Can't remember what you did
But I hate it
You know exactly what to do
So that I can't stay mad at you
For too long, that's wrong
But, I hate it
You know exactly how to touch
So that I don't wanna fuss and fight no more
And you completely know the power that you have
The only one that makes me laugh
Sad and it's not fair how you take advantage of the fact
One of these days, maybe your magic won't affect me
And your kiss won't make me weak
But no one in this world knows me the way you know me
So you'll probably always have a spell on me.
I believe the lyrics to this song are what relationships are about. Love doesn't exist. There is just that person that we care about so much that regardless of what they do we can't live without.
The definition of a 'soul mate' is someone who completes you. But that's just selfish, we can't expect someone to complete us without considering that the other person expects the same.
whoops forgot to add that the lyrics are to Kal's youtube recommendation of -hate that I love you by Rihanna.
ReplyDeleteI won't think there are many people are availabe for me. It is unfair to my love if i have this mind. Somehow, I may not do my best on that relation as I think I will have another better one.
ReplyDeleteIs there a perfect one for everyone? I don't know. At least, I haven't found my perfect love.
I totally agree with Benson's point, love is not a matching game, it's about care and forgiveness. When we meet somebody we love, we can not know if he/she is your best soul mate,just find the person you love,you can develop the love between the two, probably that person will be your best soul mate.
ReplyDeleteI prefer the idea that there are many people out there who are perfect for us. Lkie MingTao saying, "love is not a matching game", but people usually consider more and more whether the person they fall in love with is the best choice in their life. Most people will confuse to look for another person constantly in the process of love since they think others will be better than this one who I am loving now. Also, they think that there are many people perfect for them, so that they continue to finding the best choice among those people in each love relationship. They will compare to all their lovers previous and now loving, for they believe that if you don't find a lot, you don't really know who is the best one for you.
ReplyDeleteTo be honest, I do not believe either answer is true. Soul mates are what people have created to give themselves the illusion of belonging. It serves to somewhat justify our existence and would shed some light to our life’s meaning, however, that does not necessarily mean we are destined to have such a life partner. Our fate and destiny is molded by our very actions, for every action we take, there is an opportunity cost expended. For example, if we choose to go out Saturday night, we forego the opportunity to study or complete our homework. Destiny can only be what we attempt to make it to be.
ReplyDeleteIn this day and age, to believe that the existence of a perfect entity that completely mirrors our ideals, nature, and other things we hold dear is becoming increasingly difficult to believe. Of course it is possible to find love in this world, however, this would disintegrate into an even more complex question – How does one define love? Statistics have shown that approximately 60% of marriages in the United States result in divorces. Our desires and ambitions in life constantly change, so it is possible that one day we find a person that we share chemistry with, but on another day, our interests have changed.
Therefore, in my opinion, the existence of a soul mate, “a person who is such a perfect match that they bind with us perfectly, completing us, making us whole” is impossible due to the growths and changes we experience as we mature.
I just think we have a long life to live, we might not have only one soul mate, or we might not end up with the soul mate we want. The world is such reality that there will be a lot of unexpected things to be happen in a relationship. People get married with the person they though is their soul mate, for me, i just think soul mate is a person that meet the requirements that you want your mate to have, that doesn't mean that you really love the person that much. Romantic love will be the person that you will love much more because when this love happens, the chemistry would be a lot stronger than what a long term relationship will be. Romantic love usually does not last long, because it came fast, and it goes away fast too. I always heard that to find someone love you more than you love another person , than the relationship will be better.There will be perfect match, but not every person are lucky enough to find their love.I do agree there are loves available, it just depends do you give yourself a chance to make that happens, i see a lot of people have have better qualities to be with another person, they just choose not to, they are so tired of finding another mate or they are so used to the person they are with. I always believe love just don't always come to you, you got to make romance happens sometimes.
ReplyDeleteI believe that Mr. Right is waiting for someone, for the only one he/she wants. There is a Chinese saying, “Our lover is already chosen by match-maker because there is a red-line bind our foot with the other unique person’s foot before we are born.” So, I think even though we may suffer a lot in love, we still can find our Mr. Right.
ReplyDeleteA soulmate is that special someone who you end up with as a life partner; your spouse; the love of your life; and that person with whom you have found a place of bliss and magic. This person was destined to play that role in your life; that explains why you only dated other people before her but did not find the spark to make you committ.
ReplyDeleteI had a few relationships before I got married but as far as I was concerned, I was only having fun. The moment my wife came into my life,it was never the same again. I suddenly wanted to become a husband; I wanted to have kids; and I wanted a girl to grow old with.
Some people sadly cannot sustain this kind of relationship for a long time due to so many reasons, ranging from greed to infidelity. They choose to mess up a perfect union just because of lust or selfishness. Those who work hard at sustaing their union find it most rewarding. They live a wholesome life of bliss and happiness and they live longer.
Your union with your soulmate is like a synergy- you complement each other;you have more resources; you have a prop in your distress; and you both make up a formidable think-tank to help build an equally formidable and lovely family. It is indeed a blessing from above!